Me
(8:04PM)
And for some people the night is still young, but this is starting to get old. I've been working the second shift for the last week or so, which for my section is unusual because this is the first time since I've been here that we've worked a second shift. The rest of the place is dead to the world, and it's just me and one other guy here, which gives me a perfect opportunity to toss lines without tossing my lunch. It's been a very rough couple of weeks, actually getting closer to three. There is a very good friend I have that means a lot to me who suddenly ceased to drop me any lines, and I really feel a void right now. It was she who gave me some serious advice somewhere around this time frame last year, telling me to guard my heart, having gone through a similar ordeal as I. I tried guarding my heart over the course of our friendship because I didn't want to take the same road I had traveled before, and I didn't want to put her through any serious grief either. But I'm feeling some pain at the moment, and I don't even know if she's ever going to read this or not, although she knows that it's here. The other pain surrounding this is the fact that I'm married, but I've been going through some serious changes over the past four years, and she knows about those changes, this friend that I've been speaking of. You develop a closeness with someone when you bare your soul on certain things, but now for some strange reason she no longer sends any lines my way, and there are some times when I feel a little on the side of undone, because I don't know why. I always tried to keep things kosher for both our sakes, and I always wanted to be for her what she wanted me to be, someone she could share her heart with without having to wonder whether she was going to be judged for feeling a certain way. But now I don't know what I am. One thing I do know I'm lonely inside. I used to really look forward to hearing from her. We would toss lines back and forth just about every day, but now it's been almost three weeks and all I've gotten is two very short emails, about four lines tops. Like a lot of things, I know what I'm feeling inside will pass, but I just wish I knew why, and now I guess I'm gone.
And for some people the night is still young, but this is starting to get old. I've been working the second shift for the last week or so, which for my section is unusual because this is the first time since I've been here that we've worked a second shift. The rest of the place is dead to the world, and it's just me and one other guy here, which gives me a perfect opportunity to toss lines without tossing my lunch. It's been a very rough couple of weeks, actually getting closer to three. There is a very good friend I have that means a lot to me who suddenly ceased to drop me any lines, and I really feel a void right now. It was she who gave me some serious advice somewhere around this time frame last year, telling me to guard my heart, having gone through a similar ordeal as I. I tried guarding my heart over the course of our friendship because I didn't want to take the same road I had traveled before, and I didn't want to put her through any serious grief either. But I'm feeling some pain at the moment, and I don't even know if she's ever going to read this or not, although she knows that it's here. The other pain surrounding this is the fact that I'm married, but I've been going through some serious changes over the past four years, and she knows about those changes, this friend that I've been speaking of. You develop a closeness with someone when you bare your soul on certain things, but now for some strange reason she no longer sends any lines my way, and there are some times when I feel a little on the side of undone, because I don't know why. I always tried to keep things kosher for both our sakes, and I always wanted to be for her what she wanted me to be, someone she could share her heart with without having to wonder whether she was going to be judged for feeling a certain way. But now I don't know what I am. One thing I do know I'm lonely inside. I used to really look forward to hearing from her. We would toss lines back and forth just about every day, but now it's been almost three weeks and all I've gotten is two very short emails, about four lines tops. Like a lot of things, I know what I'm feeling inside will pass, but I just wish I knew why, and now I guess I'm gone.
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